I recently learned that those who incarnate to learn and truly embody unconditional love experience an abundance of betrayal. I was like wow, that’s speaks volumes, not to mention explains a lot. Like a lot a lot. My experience with betrayal runs deep and is something I used to take personal. Granted most of my betrayals were from people close to me but not all. I have since forgiven all my trespassers remembering that we are all narcissists on some level until we experience an awakening on another.
I asked a friend maybe a year ago, what if narcissists were new souls and part of their behavior was because they didn’t know any better. Little did I know at the time that that was right on point. I was listening to The Alchemist who confirmed that we are all narcissists until we experience an awakening that takes us out of service to self and into service to others. I remember telling my friend I felt like I was constantly surrounded by narcissists and perhaps now I know why. I’ve had to take a more loving approach with it however, and I now refer to them as baby birds. I’m sure the end game is not to have a reference at all but as long as I’m still learning from ’em it is what it is.
I recently had someone, you could say my circle, my skating circle, lie to me without a single flinch. Repeatedly. I had already started distancing myself from this person because I can see through the facade and knew exactly what I was dealing with. There was a point in my (recent) life where I had zero tolerance for narcissistic behavior but have had to come to terms with it knowing I am not here to diminish anybody’s light, and I’m certainly not here to judge anyone’s behavior. If anything I’ve had to learn to have more tolerance aka compassion by meeting people with where they’re at. I don’t have to like it, or even hang around it, but I do have to treat everyone equal because that’s exactly what we are.
Come to find out a lot of this narcissistic behavior is actually what’s teaching unconditional love, among other things, because narcissists are excellent teachers. They also teach us how to find our self-worth and how to stick up for ourselves. They also teach us boundaries and showing us when it’s time to either distance yourself or snip snip cut that person off. Let’s not forget too that we are all connected, not to mention came here with contracts already set in place to experience certain situations to teach us whatever it is we need to learn to help us grow.
I found myself recently working with this, I don’t know if it’s a shadow, but struggling with how to deal with this particular individual. It’s easy to fall back into old patterns when we’re in the heat of it and I found myself wanting to, not teach them a lesson per se, but show them it wasn’t very cool. But instead I said nothing and needed to be more compassionate knowing I’m the bigger person here and reminding myself to just let it go. I don’t have to hang out with this person but I do have to show compassion and unconditional love, and let’s not forget forgiveness.
I was struggling with letting it bother me and when it comes to mastery that kind of behavior shouldn’t even phase me anymore. I’m learning though and I’m not expecting my mastery to form overnight so I have to be patient with myself as well and not beat myself up so to speak because I haven’t nailed this aspect yet. I’m actively working on it, obviously, but I have to be honest when I say it bums me out a little. Not that I haven’t mastered it but that people are like this. There was more than a lie but I’m not here to gossip either.
At the end of the day I have to ask myself, what would Jesus do? As cliche as it is, it speaks truth, and he is the ascended master I resonate most with. A master forgives this behavior right as it’s happening and I had to forgive this person for their behavior knowing they are a cute little baby bird with a long way to go. I know better and I have to always be the bigger person, I just have to take a deep breath, smile and move forward.
I am a constant work in progress and can now with a little bit of time truly see the lesson to be had in this whole situation, the lesson that was mine. I can’t even say I’m going to distance myself even more so from this person because I’ll see them every week but I will be silently thanking them for helping me see the importance of unconditional love and what it means to really walk the path of giving it.
Love and Light