Talent Beyond Talent
Having a bit of a moment, if you will, as I see just how talented my mom really was. I mean, I knew she was Martha Fucking Stewart, but didn’t know just how talented she really was. She was the baker, dad loves to cook and happens to excel at it so we let him, but I’m talking more on the crafty Martha Stewart side.
She sewed, embroidered, cross stitched, made pillows, curtains and everything in between. She made jewelry, things for purses (no idea what they’re even called), pin cushions and clothes. But my God, she also made bookmarks, journals, greetings cards, snowmen, Christmas trees, and other things that don’t even have names.
She liked to draw, she painted she did it all. Holy shit balls there was literally nothing she couldn’t do. Oh yeah, wreaths, floral arrangements, chandeliers. Fucking chandeliers lol.
While I’m proud, amazed and mind blown, I’m also extremely sad. Sad that I missed out on so much. Living in Colorado for the last twenty years robbed me of sharing so many things with her, learning so much from her and missing so much quality time.
I knew I missed her and missed a lot but seeing just how much I truly did miss makes my heart literally hurt and can’t help the silent tears I’m wiping away right this second. Makes me real sad that I had no idea how talented she was and drives home the feeling of missing out.
“There was literally nothing she couldn’t do.”
I‘m sharing with the world because while I may come off as super tough and uber strong and happy all the stinkin’ time (and I am), but at the end of the day, I’m human like everybody else. I hurt, I make mistakes, I can be grumpy.
But if there’s something I’ve learned (and I’ve learned a shit ton) it’s that when these kind of feelings (or any hard to admit feelings) arise you have to deal with ’em. You have to face ’em, literally have to FEEL them and then let them go and move forward.
So many people tend to push their emotions down cause nobody likes to feel uncomfortable and we certainly don’t want to be vulnerable or heaven forbid we can’t look weak. But if you don’t acknowledge ’em and feel ’em and you just shove ’em down, eventually it will all pile up and backfire.
Believe me I know, I’ve seen it and I’ve lived it. I’ve seen it finally surface, a lifetime of suppressing feelings, and then explode as I next witness someone spiral like I’ve never seen before. It’s extremely difficult to watch, heart wrenching really, especially when it’s someone you care about. I’m also a firm believer that negative emotions will manifest into shit that could’ve been avoided. So let it go.
“We certainly don’t want to be vulnerable or heaven forbid we can’t look weak.”
Feelings aren’t always happy go lucky but they are emotions in action so it’s imperative to address them so you can deal with them and then move forward in a healthy way.
And don’t take quality time for granted because things like people you care about could be here one day and gone the next. And that sucks. Cause it hurts. And that’s one to grow on.
Long story short….my mom was friggin’ talented.
— Melissa Parker
— Your Friendly Neighborhood Fearless Leader