I can’t explain exactly why my mom’s death pertains to me, I just know it does. Now that four years (today) have passed since I received that phone call I do have a better idea. With every passing day I get closer and closer to figuring out what it is I’m here to do. Her leaving this planet and transitioning back to where we came from was the beginning of my awakening and the start of a long journey that’s far from over. A journey that will continue for the rest of this lifetime and what a journey it’s been thus far but I think it’s safe to say I’ll soon be graduating.
A memory recently surfaced of what I believe to be the last time I saw my mom. We were at the airport, she was heading home to California and I was going back to Colorado. I remember having a hard time leaving her. It’s interesting that this memory resurfaced and I think has done so because I now understand why I was having such a hard time leaving her. I walked her to her terminal as I made sure my flight left after hers, my mom wasn’t anywhere near as comfortable flying or even traveling on her own like I am. I know now that my Soul knew this would be the last time I would see her with my physical eyes. I remember it like it was yesterday now and remember not wanting the moment to ever end. I had a hard time saying good bye, harder than usual. It weighs heavy on my heart today.
While I’d give anything for one more hug, another kiss and just one more chance to soak in her smell I know the time will come when we’re reunited in spirit and at least I have that to look forward to. When I think about how we all come here with a blueprint, a master plan, of what our life will be like, I take some comfort in knowing that we all knew and know exactly what we’re in for when we arrive. Part of the deal though is to have no memory of it coming in so we can actually learn from our mistakes and grow from them along with our victories. When I think about the state of the world today and how so many people are suffering I’m reminded by Spirit of how it’s all for purpose, all for soul growth and evolution.
My mom knew before she was born when her exit point was and why she was leaving. I personally feel like she knew it would be hard but she also knew it was for purpose and that’s why she hasn’t left my side, she continues to pave the way and watches over me as most of our passed on loved ones do. It’s funny because my cousin Kimmie texted me the other night to say happy crappy month of March, or something like that. Her mom transitioned shortly after mine. My popo also left us in the month of March, there’s a handful of ’em. I totally forgot though and was like I don’t know if I would’ve remembered and that’s gotta be because that’s not what I focus on. That and the fact that my journey truly is unique and she really hasn’t left my side.
It’s interesting how my cousin Kimmie texted me to remind me and it’s only now as I’m writing this that I’m reflecting on it deeper and thinking to myself how I must’ve needed some more healing because had she not reminded me I really feel like I would’ve gone through the day without realizing it was her transition day. Then the memory surfaced again, and again, and I now recognize just how connected we all really are and there’s so much about the unseen I still have yet to discover. It’s kind of hard to explain but I’m sure with more time everything will continue to make more sense.
Speaking of unexplainable, something else I can’t explain happened Saturday night at work. I was sitting there listening to something about starseed markings on YouTube when I heard this SNAP. When I looked up I saw nothing at first glance, I looked around and then upon further investigation I saw a little white tissue. Mind you there’s no one in the store, it’s just little ole me. The sound was very distinct, in fact I have a box of these guys in storage.
No way. So as I’m typing this, I go to look up what these little things are called and you can say this is coincidence if you want but there just so happens to be a picture of ’em next to a penny. Since there’s no such thing as coincidences in my world I’m just gonna call it magic and say thank you. Speaking of mom lol.
Apparently these things are called whipper snappers or poppers. I like whipper snappers, that’s such a rad name. So yeah, you know the sound, there’s no mistaking it. I heard it, I looked up, there’s the whipper snapper, but there’s nobody there to throw it. I blinked, looked to the left. I blinked hard again and looked to the right, there was nobody there. I’ll even share my journal with you.
There it is on the counter, my feet are propped up just below it on a wicker basket full of hangers and then I placed it on top of my lunch box, which is right next to my feet, to get a better picture. When I was done picking my jaw up off the floor I taped it to my journal.
But wait, there’s more. On my way home Sunday night I went to unlock my bike and was greeted by the number 144. Not the first time I’ve come to my lock to see an angel number. It’s the second time. Spirit never seizes to amaze. Have I mentioned how much I love my life? Probably not because I think I’m finally at the point where I actually feel that way. Don’t get me wrong I’m usually happy and optimistic but these past few years have definitely had their rough spots, it’s been a real life roller coaster. Like I mentioned I’m on the cusp of graduation and I couldn’t be more excited. I can almost hear, “YOU DID IT” echoing through the corridors of the universe. Yay.
Love and Light