Right now I’m reprogramming my mind to feel safe and comfortable in the unknown. I’m using everything I’ve learned along the way to get me through this time of what I’ve heard considered my final exam. I’m also one to take timing with a grain of salt. If I had a dollar for every time I thought or considered myself to be in a grand finale, I wouldn’t even find myself in this squeeze as I call it.
The truth is there is no ending to a journey that takes a lifetime. With that said though I do find myself in a position where I feel like I’m working my way towards the light at the end of the tunnel where the end game is some kind of graduation. There has to be forward movement, it’s the organizing principle that keeps not just the momentum going but it’s the evolution of our soul.
Everything happens for a reason and today I’ve come to the understanding that I am releasing any and all residual aspects of fear, worry and doubt. It can be bitter pills to swallow however I am completely aware that this isn’t happening to me, but rather for me. I’ll be honest, it took a few for it to really sink in and thank goodness I had a good nights sleep to process most of it. In fact, I dreamt I ran into a guy I used to see all the time on the pier with his bike. I told him I had to release control and surrender to the universe.
I had another dream where I opened my car door to a bunch of individually wrapped gifts, one of ’em was a picture frame engraved with Parker The Spy. Haha, I don’t know what that means exactly but it’s funny. The best part though was that parked behind me was my nana who wanted to say hello. Dreams don’t always make sense but this one was pretty crystal clear.
I can’t say I wasn’t warned either because a random Depeche Mode song showed up in my playlist, it was completely out of place. After enjoying some nostalgia as it reminded me of my brother, about twenty minutes later my internet services were suspended.
Can’t say I wasn’t warned there either, T-Mobes sent me a couple texts telling me that was about to happen. I have to be honest again, part of me was like nah, Spirit wouldn’t take away my music, not to mention my date nights with Bob Ross. Think again, here I am on day two with suspended services and no idea how long it’ll last. No internet, no music, no nada, at home anyway.
I’m not worried I won’t get it back, I know I will, I’m just in this space where I’m reprogramming my mind. I have to admit it is a little comforting to not even think about using my phone. It’s a new conditioning where I no longer let my mind race and worry about not just things I can’t control but it’s about disengaging all together.
It’s also about being adaptable and finding solutions in other ways which is why I find myself going back to my roots so to speak. Here I am sitting in the library completely grateful it’s even an option, and within walking distance. We know I’m not driving anywhere either with very little petro in the tank and no funds in the bank to fill it.
I have to be careful though, this is another layer to what’s happening. It’s Law of Attraction 101, and if I focus on the fact that my resources are depleted right this second, then that’s the energy I’m bringing forth. Like attracts like so I am doing my best to focus on the positives while staying in the present moments (as much as possible).
Sure I think about what’s to come, because I know something is coming, multiple miracles are on the horizon, Spirit keeps reminding me. I just don’t know what, when, why or how. And that’s okay because I understand things come along when they should and need to, and the more calm I about it all, the better it’ll work itself out. Peaceful warrior mode needs to be in full effect.
I also understand you create resistance, blockages even, when you start analyzing the twenty questions because the answers aren’t available in a linear way, especially with this new energy where everything is pretty much quantum. This is all about the power of the mind right now, on so many levels. This process could take three days, it could take three weeks, I don’t even know.
It’s my job to be in charge of what I’m focusing on which is best case scenario. True optimism is the mindset of acknowledging hard reality while remaining confident that you will prevail. It’s about facing the darkness and staying positive. It requires knowing you’ll overcome the obstacles and truly believing you live in the land of abundance.
We’ve been programmed, brainwashed really, into thinking we’re separate from the Source of All That Is, which couldn’t be further from the truth. I am in the process of training my brain, and apparently Spirit thinks it would be easier done in silence. I couldn’t agree more actually because when I really think about it, I was starting to use YouTube as a crutch, a distraction really. In all fairness I relied heavily on it for my education and guidance, however the time has come where I don’t necessarily need it, at least not in the sense that I used to. It’s time to buckle down and focus.
Is it any wonder the last movie I watched on Sunday was Heatstroke where the moral of the story is basically being a badass. This woman had to find the courage and strength to do some pretty heavy stuff. I even commented on it and wrote, we are so much stronger than we give ourselves credit for. Little did I know at the time that it was my future self giving me a little pep talk for what was about to transpire. It’s not that big of a deal at the end of the day, and I know this, and that’s because I understand what’s happening. Thank goodness I have the wherewithal to get me through it. I didn’t say it was easy, it can go either way when it comes to the power of the mind.
I’m always proving to myself how adaptable I can be which is a superpower in and of itself. You have to be able to keep a sane mind. There was a hyena in the movie too that kept making an appearance which nudged me to look up the spiritual meaning. The hyena symbolizes adaptability, fierce loyalty, and keen intuition. Often misunderstood, the hyena totem represents surviving through unconventional means, community-mindedness, and the ability to find humor during challenges. Instead of surviving though, it’s more about thriving in my world, at least that’s what I’m training my brain to perceive.
I went to the beach last night to watch the sunset and halfway there realized I forgot my padded stadium cushion, a must for me when I’m sitting on hard surfaces. I don’t have much junk in my trunk, never have, I get it from my popo, he used to joke he lost his butt in a poker game. Haha me too.
I was wondering why I forgot it (because everything happens for a reason) when on my way back it became clear that it was so I could see a parade of signage sent from all things invisible. First it was a smiley face ball cap, followed by a t-shirt that read…Be Strong Stay Strong. Another t-shirt that read SELF LOVE CLUB followed by 222 in a license plate. On my way home I was blessed with another smiley face in the bike shop.
All signs to remind me that I am loved and taken care of and I’ve got this. I am officially at the mercy of all things divine. I am guided and loved beyond measure. All reminders to keep my chin up as I’m learning to navigate the unknown. It’s my new way of life where everything flows to me and needless to say it takes time and practice to get used to it.
I’m learning to rely even more so on my intuition these days. My best course of action is to trust with everything I’ve got. I have to keep a sense of humor too which can seem daunting when you’re feeling the squeeze.
I have to keep it light, we can’t take anything too seriously. I just overheard the library’s gonna be closed next week, my usage just might be short-lived. Guess I’ll mentally prepare for that too, just in case. Why do I have a sneaky suspicion I’m taking silence is golden to a whole new level? Whether I like it or not lol.
NEW ERA…NEW EARTH…NEW ENERGY
Love and Light